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| Danny Dyer in Human Traffic |
How wonderful must the world be for Danny Dyer? In his illustrious career, he
has: been a football hooligan, married Arabella Weir, been beaten up by football hooligans, divorced Arabella Weir, discovered
the true meaning of Star Wars, met real football hooligans, shagged Scully (of X Files, not the family from
Neighbours), ran away from real football hooligans, wanked in front of a mirror, been attacked by a comedy murderer, screamed
at John Simm, been a football hooligan in prison, met Lily Allen, gone to Spain and been beaten up by football hooligans whilst
portraying a football hooligan.
Dyer epitomises one of the three depictions of the Geezer Holy Trinity. The "Hard Men",
including Ray Winstone, and The Mitchell Brothers are the big blokes: leaders of their firm, usually bald, hard as rock but
generally likable for their comedy threats. There's the "Psychos". Think Ben Kingsley in Sexy Beast and you're pretty
much there. Finally, there's Dyer's category. He's a lovable little scamp really. A geezer in every sense of the world, but
with just enough heart and charm to keep him in your good books.
When we look back on today's cinema in years to come, we will talk about the greats: Christian
Bale, Johnny Depp, Forest Whittaker if he stops appearing in crap films. Danny Dyer will hardly be a cinema icon. So why do
we love him so much? Because we're British, and we love football. And who, by coincidence, appears in every decent film about
football? It's only our mate Danny Dyer!
Dyer is best known for appearing in films by Nick Lowe, most notably The Football Factory.
I'm not going to say much about it, since we have a feature pending on the topic, but this film is what Dyer does best. He
talks Cockney, he walks Cockney, and he likes football. It's the typical London geezer film, shown clearly by the Liverpool
scenes bearing the vague location subtitle "Up North". As a Northerner living in London, I can tell you that most Southern
blokes would probably place Liverpool directly beneath Newcastle, so it's not just him. The best thing about The Football
Factory is it's basically Danny Dyer being himself. (Anyone who's seen his reality series, which is basically Ross
Kemp on Gangs with more football, will testify to this.)
The same can't be said about Human Traffic. Despite his character, Moff, maintaining
some of that distinctive Dyer charm, his character is entirely different to the roles that made him famous. You'd think it'd
be his downfall, but Human Traffic turns out his finest performance. Perhaps playing second fiddle to John Simm's
terrific lead role relieved the pressure and just allowed Dyer to have fun. And in a film that's all about having fun, it's
a good job.
Like Keanu Reeves, Danny Dyer will be remembered for the legend surrounding him rather than
the roles he's played. Dyer is not an actor, he's an idea. Men love him, women love him, and Britain certainly loves him.
It must be great being Danny Dyer.
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